2.10.2014

Oh, I gone get mine! (said in a VERY southern accent)

     Nick LOVES to say this!…every time someone cuts us off in traffic, takes the last of something, eats an enormous bite of food, walks like they're on a mission, cuts to the front of the line…the list goes on. Pretty much anytime someone does something that is somewhat selfish or puts themselves first, Nick uses this phrase and uses it in a very womanly deep southern accent.  Kind of scary how good he is at it.

     Another phrase that Nick LOVES is, "Where da cake at?".  He basically falls back on this one anytime something (like listed above) happens, but he has overused "oh, I gone get mine!".  He switches back and forth between the two to keep things fresh.
   
     Nick didn't always use these cute little phrases.  It pretty much all started one year ago.  My mom, Mary Ashley and I went to the Civic Center for a Bridal Expo right before Mary Ashley's wedding.  For weeks, we looked forward to our special outing.  We got dressed up in cute girly outfits, arrived on time, got our tickets, received a glass of complementary champagne and were giggling (Mary Ashley and me…not my mom) with excitement as we walked through the doors.  Everything was so amazing.  Wonderful photographers.  White dresses.  Beautiful decorations.  Delicious cakes.  Perfectly set tables.  Romantic music.  Everything you could ever want for your wedding, right there at our fingertips.  I couldn't wait to seek out every adorable little booth and see what they had to offer.  I was really feeling the mood and hearing wedding bells…until…this group of about seven fairly large women walked in right behind us and immediately said, "Where da cake at?".  UUuummmm…..What?  I turned around for visual proof and, yes, they really said that.  Those women saw everything that I saw and that's the first thing that came out of their mouths?  Not even one of them commented on the beautiful Expo!  I think my mouth fell open I was so flabbergasted.  I will never forget that moment, but I still thought that it was at least comical.  Our groups parted almost immediately as Mary Ashley, my mom and I began to browse and they walked away…probably in search of the cake.  During the Expo, each of us was allowed to taste-test cake samples from local bakeries.  We got these sweet little plates with these delicate little bites of cake.  It was like a fairy princess tea party!  I'm serious…this type of thing really does make me feel happier and girlier.  Mary Ashley and I tried three flavors between the two of us.  As more and more women got samples, I noticed that many of them had somehow acquired large dinner plates and take-out boxes and had filled them up with cake.  Like REALLY filled them up.  Like the amount of cake pieces were unknown, they were so filled up.  Like overflowing and crumbs falling on the floor, they were so filled up.  They got drinks, forks, sat down in chairs and ate that cake like it was their dinner.  It wasn't funny anymore…I was thoroughly grossed out!

     Then, last week, I was at the McLeod Health and Fitness Center.  I LOVE to go there to exercise to relax in the dry sauna.  Usually I am in there alone, but this time I had some company.  After I had turned on the lights, adjusted the temperature, gotten comfy and started to dose off, another woman came in.  She threw the door open, turned off the lights (weird), changed the temperature, put eight towels out (weirder), stood right beside me in the 10 by 15 foot room (weirdest), then stripped naked (I have no words).  As she is standing beside me, stripping naked, I am trying to not look.  At the same time, it is hard NOT to look because she is SO CLOSE to me!  I kept thinking "what in the world?!" and "what is wrong with her?!".  Once she was naked, she took the eight towels.  She wrapped one of them around her neck to hang down the front of her body.  Then she wrapped one around her lower area.  She stepped onto the lower bench beside my head to climb onto the upper bench and laid down right above me.  She obviously wanted to air everything out because she put her arms up and over her head and spread her legs out as far as they could go.  In this particular sauna there is enough space for six adults to lay down and stretch out and she chooses to do so directly above and beside me!!!  She was so close that I could smell her…she smelled like animal crackers, so it wasn't bad, but still…give me some space!  My thoughts were going crazy and I kept wanting to get up and move to have some personal space, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings either…so I stayed.  After about 15 minutes, she crawled out from above/beside me, stepped down beside my head on the lower bench and left the sauna.  I kept laying there, rolling over in my head what just happened…I seriously couldn't believe it.  I got up and walked out of the sauna and through the Women's Locker Room towards the gym when I saw the same woman.  She was sitting in the center of the love seat, both arms resting on the back, remote control in hand, one towel covering her chest and one towel wrapped around her lower area, legs spread out and her high top covered feet resting on the coffee table.  I seriously have never seen this before.

     I came home and told Nick and you know what he said?  "Oh, I gone get mine!".

     When these things happen I always think "I would NEVER do that!".  I would never take loads and loads of cake when a bakery was only offering a taste.  I would never turn off the sauna room light when someone already had it on.  I would never change the temperature when someone had already chosen the one they wanted.  I would never invade someones personal space to that extent.  I would never cut someone off in traffic.  I would never cut in front of someone in line.  I would never not be polite.  I would never not be sensitive to others.  I would never not follow the rules.  I would never.  I would never.  I would never.

     Because we ALL know I'm perfect right?!?!?!!?

     So, then I thought maybe I'm not so different than these people since the problem is OUR sense of entitlement!  Maybe I don't hog the cake or the sauna, but I have things that I think that I'm entitled to!  For instance:  I deserve a finished house.  I deserve appliances that work correctly.  I deserve clean comfortable clothes.  I deserve a real driveway.  I deserve a car that runs well.  I deserve to eat good food.  I deserve to be treated fairly.  I deserve.  I deserve.  I deserve.

     But actually, we don't deserve anything…NONE of us do!!!…and that's why we ALL need Jesus!  However, Nick does a good job of reminding me…when I'm starting to get cranky or selfish, he will respond with "where da cake at?" or "oh, I gone get mine!".  Although I want to strangle him when he does that to me, its a good lesson and we usually end up laughing :)

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